Archive for September, 2010
Do you ever doubt that you are on the right path?
Posted by: | CommentsRecently, I was having a conversation with someone around this very
subject. He was wondering if he was on the right path because he
was not getting the business that he needed to keep moving forward.
His business had dropped off significantly over the past few years
due to the economy and other trends in his field. He’s been living
off his savings lately and was considering going out and getting
another job, but he did not want to. He loves his work and the idea
of giving it up and doing something else was painful.
We talked about his situation for awhile, and it became very clear
that he was doing exactly what he is meant to be doing, but his
fear and doubt were stopping him from putting himself out there in
bold new ways in order to attract business.
His energy was used up by questioning his self worth and he did
not trust in his ability to make it work. As things got tougher and
tougher, the fearful voice in his head got louder and his
self-doubt grew. Every unsuccessful offer became an opportunity for
that voice to say:”I told you so.”
Have you ever felt that way?
I sure have!
I have stood chest deep in my fear around not making enough money,
and no one wanting what I am offering. My fear drained my energy
and caused me to make a bunch of half-assed attempts to offer my
services. I was so afraid of being rejected; I did not really even
try to put myself out there. Of course no one hired me, and I could
hear my fear whispering in my ear: “I told you so”.
So what did I do?
I learned how to kick-fears ass so that it no longer has power over me.
I learned how to acknowledge, explore and replace my fear with thoughts about what I wanted in my life.
You can read more about how I did this in this blog post.
Once I did this, I was able to own that I was on the right path and
I was 100% committed to making it work. I began to show up fully in
my business and it became much easier to stretch myself and try new
things to stand out from the crowd. Failure is not an option for me.
My questions to your are:
What would be possible if fear was not controlling you anymore?
What would you try?
How would you show up in your business and your life?
Share your answers in the comments below!
Does satisfaction stop growth?
Posted by: | CommentsThe other day on Twitter, some dude sent this tweet out: Are you satisfied with your life? Satisfaction stops growth.
It made me stop and think…does satisfaction stop growth?
I think that feeling satisfied with your life is a good thing. It allows you to be in a place of appreciation for what you have and it gets those juicy, good feelings flowing. I think that satisfaction leads more peace and happiness.
What do you think?
In my experience; being un-satisfied sucks and leads to lots of frustration, stress, and un-happiness. I went through a big part of my life feeling un-satisfied. My job was never good enough, my relationships weren’t making me happy, and I was never satisfied by what I accomplished. I was always reaching for something more, or different, thinking that if I just got that “thing’ I would be happy.
You know what? I was rarely happy! I was never satisfied and nothing was ever enough. I was always chasing after something more. It was exhausting!
This all shifted when I learned how to appreciate the things I had in my life, and recognize all of my accomplishments. Then I was able to be satisfied with what I had created for myself. Being satisfied felt good. It meant I could sit back and relax and enjoy my life. I was much happier and more peaceful.
Did being satisfied with my life make me sit stagnant? Hell no! It rocketed me forward.
Being happy, and more relaxed allowed me to focus on the thing things that felt good to me. Rather than spending my time focused on my sucky job and how dissatisfied with I was, I enjoyed my life and tried new things that interested me. I had more energy to socialize and have fun. I had more confidence in my ability to manifest what I wanted. Life got really juicy and fun.
What’s your experience with this? Do you think that being satisfied with your life helps or hinders your growth?
Share your perspective in the comments down below
Why are we all so clueless when it comes to our own happiness?
Posted by: | CommentsBack in the day I was miserable in my job, and my “exciting, fabulous life” was completely unsatisfying. I was having a major identity crisis and had no idea who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do with my life.
On the surface it looked like I had it all. I had a job that paid well that I had lots of opportunities at. I had a nice apartment in the cool part of town. I was “somebody” in my social scene and I got VIP treatment at all the nightclubs and restaurants that I went to. I had a large circle of friends and there was always something to do.
It all felt so meaningless to me. I knew that there was something more out there for me, but I had no idea what it was. I felt unsatisfied, and this was a problem. It made me cranky, frustrated, and I liked to blame everyone else, especially at work, for my dissatisfaction. I was stressed out most of the time and I got sick a lot.
I had no idea what I wanted, I just knew that what I was living was not it.
How is it possible that I had no clue about what I wanted?
How could I not know what would bring satisfaction and meaning to my life?
I know that I’m not unique in having this problem. I hear similar stories from clients all the time.
I feel that I am meant for something more, but I am not sure what that is.
I am not sure what I want but I know that this is not “it”.
I want my life and work to be more meaningful, but I have no idea what that looks like.
How can everyone be so clueless around what would make them happy?
I think it all boils down to this:
We are not taught how to determine what would feel meaningful and make us happy.
We are actually taught the opposite.
We are taught how to; behave, do as we’re told, follow the rules, and like what we’re given.
And if you are like me, you spent a lot of time resisting this, but ultimately you learned that it was easier to play along and fit in.
You learn how to tune out the part of you that says “but I want this” and you half-heartedly embrace what you’re supposed to want.
BUT, there is always a part of you that is crying out for something more. Unfortunately, you get really good at ignoring it because it is too painful to hear.
The end result is that you hit your thirties and start to wonder “Is this it?” and a mid-life crisis is waiting for you right around the bend.
So….. what do you do?
How do you learn to tune into what really is meaningful to YOU and will make YOU happy?
Here are a few tips to get you started.
Start listening to the part of you that wants more from life. Give it permission to come forward and be heard.
Notice the parts of your life that feel bad to you. Get specific around what does not work for you. Then ask yourself what you would want instead.
Commit to looking for things that feel good and make you happy. Embrace them even if they’re unconventional and far from the norm.
Try these tips out and let me know what you discover in the comments below.
If you decide that you are tired of struggling with this on your own, send me an email by clicking here, to discuss how we can work together to get you clear on exactly what will bring more meaning and satisfaction to your life.
