Archive for create
It’s all about me….no really!
Posted by: | CommentsI was listening to a friend complain about her relationship the other day. She was unhappy with her partner and how they were communicating. Her complaining about him is nothing new. She wants him to behave differently, blames him for their problems and likes to make him wrong. Every time I see her it is more of the same thing.
It sounds just like me 5 years ago.
I used to be a professional at blaming my partner for everything that was going wrong in our relationship.When it came down to it, everything that he did that made me uncomfortable I declared to be wrong. He needed to communicate more effectively, change the way he did things, and remember to do this or that. I put all the responsibility on him for changing the dynamics of our relationship. I was unhappy and it was his fault.
I was always blaming him and making myself out to be the victim of his personality flaws.
Talk about not taking responsibility for my own happiness!
Then I began to understand how I could apply the concepts of personal responsibility to my relationships.I embraced the idea that I am responsible for my own happiness, and if I am dissatisfied with the way things are, it is up to me to do something different in order to create the change I am looking for. It is my job to shift my perspective, and to clean up any old stories that I am carrying that are getting in my way. My expectations and frustration are all about me and how I think things should be. That does not make them true for anyone else.
Let’s face it, we are all really just doing our best and being ourselves. In most cases, no one is purposefully trying to be a jerk, unless that is what you expect from them. (When you cast someone into that roll, and you expect nothing less, then that is what you get.)
I guarantee that when you are having an issue with someone’s behavior, it is really all about you.
The best way to change things is to identify your own role in it.
What exactly is making you upset?
What can you do differently to create the results you are looking for?
What old story do you need to let go of?
How can you accept your partner for who they are, perceived flaws and all, and learn to interact with that person, rather than trying to force them to be who you think they should be ?
I am going to honest with you; it takes courage and determination to fully embrace the idea of personal responsibility. Changing you behavior can be hard work. You have to pay attention to what you’re doing and saying. You often end up having to deal with old stuff that you would rather forget about. In my experience it is worth it. My life and relationships have changed dramatically for the better. It also puts your happiness back into your own hands. That in itself is worth it.
Are you willing to take this on?
Try it out and let me know what happens.
What to ‘Work’ At
Posted by: | CommentsPeople will say, “Well, I have to work on my goals,” or, “I have to work on my visualization.” And we want you to think more about holding the vision because it is pleasurable to hold the vision, not because you’re trying to make the vision work in order to get to some place that you’re not now standing. “How much should I work?” We would say, work in the sense of joyously moving forward — Abraham
Excerpted from the workshop in North Los Angeles, CA on Monday, August 13th, 2001
I find this statement to be very powerful! Most people set goals, or create a vision, and then begin the process of working towards making them happen. Then every time they think about that goal, they are focusing on what is not done yet, what is still not there, and what they need to do in order to make it happen. The energy around it becomes stressful and it all feels like work. Your attention is going to the lack of what you desire.
In my mind, the purpose of a goal and your vision of it, is to allow you to get into the energy of what you want to create in your life. By setting a goal, and focusing your attention on it, you are telling the Universe what you want. The thing is, if you are thinking about that goal and how hard you need to work to make it happen, that is exactly what you are going to experience…having to work hard.
If you add in the tendency for folks to focus on how it is not showing up…then you get more of that energy.
So, I suggest focusing on your goals as a means to remind yourself of all the juicy stuff that you are calling forth into your life. When you think of them, notice what has already showed up and apprecitate it. When you are taking action make sure you are doing it from a good feeling place, knowing that what you are doing is bringing you into alignment with what you desire. Enjoy the process. Its your life after all and it is meant to be fun and feel good to you!
Why Your Bad Day Just Keeps Getting Worse.
Posted by: | CommentsEver have one of those days when you wake up late, stub your toe rushing to the bathroom and things just go down hill from there? This quote does a great job explaining why.
Every thought that you think is vibrating at a very personal frequency . . . and by the powerful Law of Attraction (the essence of that which is like unto itself, is drawn), that thought is now attracting another thought that is its Vibrational Match. And now, those combined thoughts are vibrating at a frequency that is higher than the thought that came before; and they will now, by the Law of Attraction, attract another and another and another, until eventually the thoughts will be powerful enough to attract a “real life” situation or manifestation.
— Abraham
Excerpted from the book “Money and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Health, Wealth and Happiness”
The cool thing about the Law of Attraction is that it works to create a amazing and satisfying day too. It is simple, when you wake up take a few minutes to think about something that feels really good to you.
Maybe you imagine how it feels to get all your work done in an easy fun manner,
or all the things you appricate about your life.
Or better yet, take some time to play and frolic with your lover at the start of your day (or your pets or whatever feels good to you), so that you start the day with that juicy energy. Bask in the good feelings and watch them expand.
What juicy goodness would you like to start your day with?
The Path to a Life that Rocks
Posted by: | CommentsSomeone recently asked me if I could map out the steps that they needed to follow in order to find more happiness and meaning in their life.
This is what I came up with.
The Path to a Life That Rocks!
1). Take 100% responsibility for your experience in life
2). Be Curious.
3). Invite your Inner-Freak out to play.
4) Tune into your inner-guidance system.
5). Explore everything and anything that looks interesting to you. Try it on for size.
- If it feels good DO it! Follow your Yes!
- If you don’t like it, let it go.
6). Embrace mistakes, they are an essential part of learning new things and discovering what works.
7). Become comfortable with the discomfort of exploring your edge and pushing your boundaries.
8). Embrace Change
9).Amplify the Energy that you want more of in your life.
10). Be committed to feeling things fully.
Every experience is a direct result of the energy that you are sending out.
The Most Important thing you can do to create a Life that ROCKS is this:
Be committed to feeling good.
Talking about Coaching with my Superstar Client
Posted by: | CommentsAdrienne is a dream client. She is hip, cool, fun , and full of great ideas. I have no doubt that she is going to create everything she desires in her life. One of her many cool offerings is a U-Tube show called Everyday Abundance. She rocks it out ! As part of her process she wanted to make a video about our work and share it with her audience. Here it is. I hope you enjoy it!
