Archive for life coaching
Where the Juicy Goodness Can Be Found
Posted by: | CommentsThe surest way to bring more juicy goodness into your life is
by deepening your own relationship with YOU.
This is the most important connection that you can create.
Otherwise, how do you know what brings you happiness, meaning
and success?
This is trickier than it may sound for many people, especially the
freaky folks.
We live in a society where there are lots of expectations and
pre-packaged beliefs around how we are ‘supposed’ to live, and
who we are ‘supposed’ to be in this world.
When you do not fit into that mold,it is easy to feel like there
is something wrong with you, and you begin to feel unworthy,
undeserving, resentful, and a whole lot of other emotions that
feels yucky.
It is really easy to start making yourself wrong for being different.
The worst part is that you tend to settle for whatever comes your
way because you think that you can’t have anything else.
You are so busy trying to be something that you are not,
there is no space to ask yourself :
“What would feel good to me?”
or
“What works in MY life?”.
These questions are the key to bringing in more Juicy Goodness.
I know this sounds simple, and it is on one level,
but I also recognize that it can be very difficult to do.
So many people never learned how to ask themselves these
questions on a regular basis.
When we are young we set our
course for who think we are supposed to be in the world.
This course is not necessarily based on who we are, but rather
who we think we should be.
So we spend our time trying to force ourselves in to a life that
does not fit, rather than exploring and discovering who we really are,
and what feels good to us. We end up in jobs that are dull,
and meaningless, in relationships that feel crappy,
and generally feeling unsatisfied.
In order to make ourselves feel better, we shop, eat,
have sex with the wrong people, read self help books,
and usually blame everyone else for our misery.
We spend our time looking outside ourselves for the solution,
when it is right there inside of us waiting to be discovered.
You are the only one who knows what is right for you.
The key is being committed to deepening your relationship with yourself.
How do you do that?
Make a commitment to knowing yourself better.
Get in the habit of asking yourself some of these key questions:
“What makes ME happy?
“What already works for me and feels good in my life?”
“What do I enjoy doing?”
“What do I want from _________________?”
( my career, relationship, health, sexuality, or any given situation)
“How do I want to feel when I _______________?”
(Am at work, in relationship, walk down the street, anything that you do)
“What would feel good to me right now?”
If you really want to get intimate with yourself, whenever something
or someone is bothering you and making you feel upset, irritated or
generally uncomfortable, ask yourself:
“What about this is making me feel uncomfortable?”.
Listen to the answers and go out and use that information to create a
life that is designed to suit your unique style.
Surround yourself with the people and things that support your happiness.
Nurture the relationship with yourself as if you were your favorite lover.
Give yourself everything you need to be happy and feel great.
You will be surprised at how easy it becomes once you get in the habit
of asking yourself what you need.
As an extra bonus you will discover
that all the people around you will benefit from your happiness.
Soon enough you will all be surrounded by all the Juicy Goodness
that life has to offer.
Does this sound doable to you?
An Unconventional Way to Create Change
Posted by: | CommentsHow do you go about creating change in your life?
I think the most common approach is identifying what you think is “wrong” with your life, and then setting up a plan to “fix” it. You spend your time and energy trying to stop doing something.
For example, if you wanted to lose weight, you may decide to stop eating junk food, and to stop spending your time sitting on the couch watching TV.
The flaw that I see in this approach is that you are focusing your attention on what you can’t have.
I don’t know about you, but as soon as I decide I am not going to have something anymore, the more I start thinking about it and wanting it. It becomes all about denying myself something and my having the discipline not to do it, which does not usually work so well for me.
This approach is also built on the premise that there is something “wrong’ with you that you need to “fix”.
Energetically this is moving you in the wrong direction. The more you focus on what is “wrong” and needs to be “fixed”, the more of that you will get.
Let’s say you decide not to eat junk food, but then that is all you can think about, and you have a chip or two, and then you feel bad for eating the chips, which makes you want to eat more chips. The next thing you know you are feeling bad about yourself for not being able to stick to your plan and you start tuning out the bad feelings by watching TV.
Do you see where I am going with this?
I have another idea for you to try.
What if rather than looking at the stuff that you want to fix and change in your life, you decided to focus on what you want more of in your life ?
What if you focus on how you might add stuff into your day that feels good, rather than being focused on stopping a behavior, or taking something away?
What would that look like for you?
Let’s go back to the losing weight example. In order for this approach to work, you need to connect to the reason why you are doing something.
Let’s say that the reason that you want to lose weight is to feel healthier and more energetic. How could you add things into your day that would allow you to feel healthier and more energetic?
Perhaps you might add more greens into your diet every day, and you decide that going for a walk increases your energy so you add that into your day too.
Then you discover that getting 8 hours of sleep a night really feels good and increases your energy so you do that too.
Adding the greens into your diet increases your bodies desire for more good food, and going for a walk and getting more sleeps leaves you energized and feeling like doing more stuff. Next thing you know, you don’t crave junk food and sitting on the couch is not so appealing.
As you begin to add these things into your day, and you feel good about them, it empowers you to do more stuff that feels good. It is a much gentler way to treat yourself and it will bring you the results that you are looking for much faster.
It all comes down to this: What you focus on expands into your reality. When you focus on what is wrong, and needs to be fixed, you get more of that. When you focus on what you want more of, and what feels good and works for you , you get more of that.
What would you rather have more of?
If you want to play with this idea further, join in and play Amplification Friday with us every Friday on the Defy the Box Fan page on Facebook.
Laying the Ground Work for the New Year part 1
Posted by: | CommentsRight about now, I start realizing that the New Year is right around the corner
and it might be a good time for setting some intentions around what I would like
to experience over the next 12 months. I am a firm believer in consciously
telling the Universe what I want more of so that it knows what to send my way.
The reality is that we are always telling the Universe what we want, but usually
we are doing it in an unconscious manner. I suggest that for the coming year
you make a commitment to doing it more consciously. You will be amazed at the results!
I feel that the best way to do this is by paying attention to what you are focusing
your attention on. If you want to be a super star at this, you will also do your
best to be conscious of what you are thinking about. Luckily, we have the ability
to control where we focus our attention, although I will be the first to admit that
it takes some effort and practice to do this.
When I go about setting intentions for the New Year, I take some time to reflect
on the past year.I find it easier to know where I want to go,
if I acknowledge where I have been.
Looking Back
As I look back over the past year, I take note of what has happened in my
business and personal life. I look at my relationships, money, my connection
to myself, and my health.
I ask myself these questions:
What has expanded?
Where have I grown?
What did not work for me? (What would be better?)
What would I like to be different?
What am I feeling good about?
What do I want more of?
What can I let go of?
Stick to the Facts
If you choose to do this yourself, I highly recommend keeping focused on
the simple factual answers to the questions, rather than the story around
why something did not work, or how it stopped you from being happy or
successful. The story is just the story and will not help you in setting
your intentions for the New Year.
Re-Focus Your Attention
When you ask yourself “What did not work for me? “, write the answers down
and then leave space to answer this question: “ What would be better?” .
When you answer the question “What would be better?” you are automatically
re-focusing your attention on what you DO want, rather than what you don’t want.
This re-focusing of your attention and energy is a powerful step in consciously
telling the Universe for what you want.
Amplifying the Energy
After I have finished reflecting on the past year, I take note of what I want
more of, what worked for me, and what would be better, and I imagine what it
would look like if I had all of those things in my life.
I play the Wouldn’t It Be Cool Game which goes something like this:
Wouldn’t it be cool if I had a long list of people who eagerly signed
up for all my classes and could not wait to work with me one-on-one so
that I could support them in really identifying the stories that stand in
the way of their success?
Wouldn’t it be cool if I discovered a cool, affordable, relaxed
space where I could hold workshops and events?
Usually, after asking myself these questions,I need a break. Some eggnog
seems like a good choice right about now! This is also the perfect time for
some fun and shenanigans.Once you are feeling refreshed you can get back to
creating your intentions.
To be continued………
Make A Career of Living Happy
Posted by: | CommentsI am a big fan of Abraham -Hicks! Every morning I get a quote from them in my in box. Lately they have been shouting out to me to spread them around.
So here you have it :
A very good career choice would be to gravitate toward those activities and to embrace those desires that harmonize with your core intentions, which are freedom and growth—and joy. Make a “career” of living a happy life rather than trying to find work that will produce enough income that you can do things with your money that will then make you happy. When feeling happy is of paramount importance to you—and what you do “for a living” makes you happy—you have found the best of all combinations.
— Abraham
Excerpted from the book “Money and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Health, Wealth and Happiness” #274Make career of living happy
I have to say that I made the choice to ‘live happy’ a few years ago and it has greatly impacted my experience in life. Sometimes it is work to keep my attention focused on the things that make me happy. I had 38 years of focusing on all the stuff I did not like or want and it was a hard habit to break. But it was well worth it!
This book is a great resource:
Feeling Good Is Where It’s At.
Posted by: | CommentsSomething to think about from Abraham-Hicks:
Hard work is not the path to Well- Being. Feeling good is the path to Well-Being. You don’t create through action; you create through vibration. And then, your vibration calls action from you.
— Abraham
(Excerpted from the workshop in Washington, DC on Saturday, May 7th, 2005 #273)
Abraham-Hicks is my favorite law of attraction source and authority. Check out these books if you like.
