Struggle

Archive for struggle

Aug

How do you know if your fear is helping you or holding you back?

Posted by: Leah | Comments (0)

I was reading a blog post by Jonathan Fields the other day that talked about the discomfort of growing and expanding into the unknown, and being willing to be vulnerable and facing the fear and discomfort because he knows that he will be stepping more fully into himself on the other side.

It sounds like he is stepping more fully into his kick-ass dream life to me!

An interesting question came up in the comments of this post:

How do you discern the difference between the fear of moving forward into the new unfamiliar-yet-appropriate direction and the fear that’s trying to tell you, no, this isn’t right for you. I sometimes have a lot of difficulty telling these two fears apart and they often seem to be disguised as one another.

This question got me thinking……

How do you tell the difference?

On the surface they may appear to be the same thing, but if you take a real close look at them you can detect some differences between the two. They feel different in your body and you will find that the way it shows up in your inner dialogue will be different. Once you dig down into it, you will discover that they are rooted in two completely different places.

To me, the fear of moving forward into an unfamiliar- yet appropriate direction seems more ego driven, where as the fear that is trying to tell you that you are heading in the wrong direction is more intuition based.

The question is which one do you take more stock in?

I always trust my intuition. My ego is often full of shit so I like question what it is telling me

For example, when I examine it closely I see that my fear around moving into unfamiliar-yet appropriate territory is really more about the outcome or results. I feel it more in my head and neck. I am not sure what to do or expect, and I don’t want to make a mistake, or look stupid. Once I get clear about what I am really afraid of, it is so much easier for me to move through it.

On the other hand, if my fear is my intuition telling me I am heading in the wrong direction, I feel it in my core and have a sense of being held back. I am unsure if I should move forward, and find myself very unwilling to take action. I am dragging my feet. I find that it is best to wait a while and gather more information, or test the waters very slowly.

In my mind, the best way to deal with fear is to meet it head on and get up close and personal with it.

The thing is that most people do not want to cozy up and get intimate with their fear. They’d rather look at it from across the room or ignore it completely. That is why it has so much power over you!

If you want to grow and expand more fully into yourself and your kick-ass dream life, you are going to have to learn how to deal with your fear, and to get familiar with what it’s trying to tell you. It is your unexamined fear that has power over you. You need to stand up to it and look down deep into the depth of it to see what is really going on for you if you want any chance of effectively moving forward. This involves self-inquiry and being willing to sit with the discomfort that you are feeling.

I would love to hear your thoughts about dealing with your fear in the comments down below.

If fear is something that you struggle with, my new e-book The 3 Steps to Kicking Fear’s Ass can help! I break down my 3 steps for moving through your fear and provide you with all the tools you need to dig down deep into your fear and see what is really going on. I also tell you how to replace your fear with something that will help you propel you forward towards your kick-ass dream. You can learn more here.

Categories : Clearing the Way

Comments (0)

Apr

Is It Really Worth It?????

Posted by: Leah | Comments (1)

The topic of struggle and pushing through has been coming up again and again recently. This is what some of you are saying:

“I know…they say that mercury is retrograde….but come on! Does it really have to be this difficult?”

“I am on the verge of giving up my dream because I am so sick of wasting my vital life energy when I keep coming up against road block after road block. Is following my dream really worth it?”

Listen closely to this:

“YES IT IS!”

It is so worth it to go after your kick-ass dream life!

Your dreams and desires are leading you to your own unique higher purpose. They feel good to think about for a reason! They are in alignment with who you really are and what will bring you the most happiness, satisfaction, and meaning into your life. Your dreams are where the juicy goodness lives.

I am not going to sit here and tell you that going for your dream is easy, because it is not. There is definitely some work involved on your part, but it does not have to be a struggle or suck all your vital life energy.

This is the thing you need to realize: These blocks and obstacles are lessons that you need to learn in order to clear away all the old “baggage” that is not in alignment with your new kick-ass life. They are an indication that it is time to step back and look within, decide what would be better, or to try a new approach. You are going to make mistakes! Maybe even big mistakes! It is not the end of the world. The better you get at tuning in and noticing how something is feeling and working for you, the sooner you can adjust your course. Then get right back to it and try something new until you discover what works for you!

If you find yourself struggling or feeling your energy drained, it is most likely because you are resisting the lesson, or trying to force your way through the obstacle. I know that this can be confusing, and frustrating! It is all about looking inside and taking ownership of your experience and treating every challenge as an opportunity for growth.

I know that from personal experience this can be difficult to do on your own. I want you to know that I am here to help you with this if you will let me. Signing up for this free webcast that is a great place to start!

Categories : Clearing the Way, coaching

Comments (1)

Mar

Confession Time…..

Posted by: Leah | Comments (0)

Over the past year I have been trying to really connect to what I do for people.
The fact of the matter is that I have tons of information to share with all of you,
and I can help in so many different ways, but it has been hard to package it all up
and offer it when there were so many different pieces involved.

Don’t get me wrong, I have been trying like hell to put out things that I thought were
helpful to you. Some of it seemed to work and some of it did not. It all became very
frustrating over the past 4-5 months.

I thought I was on the right track,but it still FELT like a struggle and I was quickly
becoming frustrated.

I will be the first one to tell you, if it feels like a struggle and you are not getting
the results that you are looking for, it is time to take a step back and re-evaluate what
you are doing.

If I am in the flow, then there is no struggle and frustration.

If I am on the right path, I am getting energy back around what I am putting out.

So I took a step back and re-evaluated what I was doing. I decided to make a significant
investment in my business and started working with Nancy Marmolejo of Viva Visibility.
Part of the work I am doing with her includes participating in the Profitable Essence program
that she is offering.

I am beginning to think that this was one of the best investments I have ever made.
I feel like I have tapped into the essence of who I am and the work I do with people.

Whew! Finally, this feels so right!
(Funny how I no longer think I know what to do..but I FEEL it…I know it in my being)

I help you crash through your limitations, fearlessly pursue your dreams, and start living your authentic, juicy life.

So look out world. I am ready to fully step into my ability to help you transform your life.

I am a champion for your non-conforming soul!

I help you crash through your limitations, fearlessly, lovingly and for good.

The end result will be that you will feel whole, part of a kick-ass abundant world, and fulfilled beyond your wildest dreams.

Do you want some of this?

Contact me today to set up your complementary CRASH test, where we will uncover exactly
what is holding you back & how to change things for good.

Categories : The Dream

Comments (0)

Mar

Are Pre-Packaged Beliefs Standing in the Way of Your Happiness?

Posted by: Leah | Comments (4)

Have you ever felt stuck in a rut, and miserable, and you just can’t see anyway out of it?

This is the problem that has brought many of my clients to me. They are feeling stuck in an uncomfortable situation and they just can’t see their way out. They want help escaping the rut and creating a life that feels good to them. The first place we start is by looking for the pre-packaged beliefs that are keeping them stuck.

What’s a Pre-Packaged Belief?

A pre-packaged belief is a story that you tell yourself about how the word works, or what is possible. These stories might be handed down to you by your family, or the people around you, or even the media. It is usually something you have heard over and over and you believe it to be true. The thing is, these stories are not necessarily true…especially for you.

Trying to live by these pre-package beliefs causes discomfort, is extremely challenging, and ultimately it doesn’t work for you. The end result is that you feel like there is something wrong with you because you can’t make it work, and you feel trapped in a situation that is totally not working for you.

Here’s and Example

I used to work with sincere, intelligent, magical guy who had just turned 30. He came to me because he was struggling in his job as a warehouse manager. He was stressed out and overwhelmed most of the time. He wanted help finding a way to make it bearable.

We soon uncovered the issue. He was really a musician at heart. Playing music put him into the bliss zone and made him come alive. He went to The Berkley School of Music and even toured with a band. But he left the music life because he wanted to get serious and settle down. It was interesting to discover that he had bought into the story that you could not make enough money to survive as a musician!

His father had drilled it into his head that he needed a secure job with a steady income in order to get ahead and survive. So, that is what he did. He left making music for his spare time, and got a decent paying, secure job.

The problem with this is that his “secure job” left him feeling depleted and depressed and he did not have the energy to make music. He began to doubt himself and started to feel like there was something wrong with him for not being happy and satisfied in his good, secure job as a warehouse manager.

Let’s Switch this Story Around!

I asked him to re-write his story about making money as a musician.

What if you could make enough money to THRIVE as a musician? What would that look like?

As he began to explore what this might look like, he began to become aware of a number of different possibilities around how this might work. I gave him some homework that allowed him to connect with this energy on a deeper level, and I taught him some tricks to use to help him stay connected to his new story of being a successful musician.

Next thing you know he had a plan. He decided to move to Atlanta and tap into the music scene there. I just heard from him the other day. After being in Atlanta for 4 months, he has lined up enough work as a professional musician to pay the bills and then some. He is living his dream and making money too. He has tapped into his ever abundant flow and life feels great!

I can help you tap into your ever abundant flow too! Check out my services page to see how we can work together to do this.

Categories : Stretching Yourself

Comments (4)

Sep

Who Says ?!?

Posted by: admin | Comments (4)

Lately, I have been having conversations with people about the places that feel crappy in their lives. It doesn’t matter what part of their life they are speaking about, the story is always the same-

This is what I have to put up with in order to have the: job, money, family, relationship, or the lifestyle that I want.

My response to them is: “Who says?”

I want to know who made up this rule!

The one that says you “have to” put up with something in your life that feels bad on a regular basis in order to have what you desire.

It appears like lots of people have bought into this rule! I see people struggling with this on a daily basis. They dread going to work, or they are not getting the affection they desire from their relationship. They may feel stuck in something or uninspired by their life. They settle for a less than satisfying situation because they think that is the only option. Then they suffer through it.

I wonder when it became “OK” to feel like that? I have to imagine that on some level you feel that it is OK for parts of your life to feel crappy if you resign yourself to staying in that place.

I was stuck in this trap too!

I had bought into the story that certain things in life were supposed to feel bad especially work! They don’t call it work for nothing right?

I thought I was supposed to make things happen by working long hard hours and always striving. You always took the highest paying job no matter if you liked it or not, because it was all about the money. It did not matter that I was exhausted, disconnected, uninspired, watching too much TV and needing to get “my party on” a few times a week.

I was stuck in a story that said this was just how life was.

I had to suffer, tune out, feel stuck, and be uninspired so that I could do the things I was supposed to do in order to have the things I wanted in life. It seemed to me that everyone around me was caught up in a similar situation.

Boy did it feel crappy!

Funny thing is, I was so caught up in this story that I did not really know the difference. I thought that was how life was supposed to be. Sometimes, I would suspect that there could be more to life. I would glimpse it every now and then in other peoples eye’s, but I could never figure out what it was exactly.

A New Perspective

Then I read a really cool book called the Four Agreements . It suggested to me that life was meant to feel good. I did not have to struggle in order to have what I wanted. I could make my own rules for how I lived my life.Opening up to this possibility shifted many things for me.

I made the choice to find a different work environment that felt better to me and I still made money. It was no longer OK to feel stuck. If it felt bad on a regular basis- something had to change. I had to change. I began working with a coach. I started to question my old story that said work was supposed to be hard and I had to suffer through in order to be successful.

Now my Reality is Different!

I no longer struggle against things that feel bad. I know that there is always a solution and it is possible to find a different way of approaching things. It does not mean I abandon something, but rather find a new way of approaching it that works for me.

If something is not feeling right, I determine what will make it feel better and I take steps to change it. I am back in a place of choice.

I make the rules for my life now. My number 1 rule is that I feel good in every aspect of my life.

What’s your number 1 rule going to be? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below.