Archive for true happiness
Where the Juicy Goodness Can Be Found
Posted by: | CommentsThe surest way to bring more juicy goodness into your life is
by deepening your own relationship with YOU.
This is the most important connection that you can create.
Otherwise, how do you know what brings you happiness, meaning
and success?
This is trickier than it may sound for many people, especially the
freaky folks.
We live in a society where there are lots of expectations and
pre-packaged beliefs around how we are ‘supposed’ to live, and
who we are ‘supposed’ to be in this world.
When you do not fit into that mold,it is easy to feel like there
is something wrong with you, and you begin to feel unworthy,
undeserving, resentful, and a whole lot of other emotions that
feels yucky.
It is really easy to start making yourself wrong for being different.
The worst part is that you tend to settle for whatever comes your
way because you think that you can’t have anything else.
You are so busy trying to be something that you are not,
there is no space to ask yourself :
“What would feel good to me?”
or
“What works in MY life?”.
These questions are the key to bringing in more Juicy Goodness.
I know this sounds simple, and it is on one level,
but I also recognize that it can be very difficult to do.
So many people never learned how to ask themselves these
questions on a regular basis.
When we are young we set our
course for who think we are supposed to be in the world.
This course is not necessarily based on who we are, but rather
who we think we should be.
So we spend our time trying to force ourselves in to a life that
does not fit, rather than exploring and discovering who we really are,
and what feels good to us. We end up in jobs that are dull,
and meaningless, in relationships that feel crappy,
and generally feeling unsatisfied.
In order to make ourselves feel better, we shop, eat,
have sex with the wrong people, read self help books,
and usually blame everyone else for our misery.
We spend our time looking outside ourselves for the solution,
when it is right there inside of us waiting to be discovered.
You are the only one who knows what is right for you.
The key is being committed to deepening your relationship with yourself.
How do you do that?
Make a commitment to knowing yourself better.
Get in the habit of asking yourself some of these key questions:
“What makes ME happy?
“What already works for me and feels good in my life?”
“What do I enjoy doing?”
“What do I want from _________________?”
( my career, relationship, health, sexuality, or any given situation)
“How do I want to feel when I _______________?”
(Am at work, in relationship, walk down the street, anything that you do)
“What would feel good to me right now?”
If you really want to get intimate with yourself, whenever something
or someone is bothering you and making you feel upset, irritated or
generally uncomfortable, ask yourself:
“What about this is making me feel uncomfortable?”.
Listen to the answers and go out and use that information to create a
life that is designed to suit your unique style.
Surround yourself with the people and things that support your happiness.
Nurture the relationship with yourself as if you were your favorite lover.
Give yourself everything you need to be happy and feel great.
You will be surprised at how easy it becomes once you get in the habit
of asking yourself what you need.
As an extra bonus you will discover
that all the people around you will benefit from your happiness.
Soon enough you will all be surrounded by all the Juicy Goodness
that life has to offer.
Does this sound doable to you?
What Stands in the Way of You Living a Life that Totally Rocks?
Posted by: | CommentsIf you could create a life that TOTALLY ROCKED, what would it look like ?
What would you spend your days doing?
Who would you hang out with?
Where would you live?
What would the weather be like?
How would you feel when you wake up in the morning?
How would you feel when you go to bed at night?
What is stopping you from living this dream right now?
What stands in your way?
I suspect that many of you think it is the money, other responsibilities (family/kids), where you live, or a number of other circumstances that stand in the way of you living your dream life. But I am here to tell you that you are wrong.
What is keeping you from living a life that totally rocks right now is your stories about who you are and what is possible for you. We all have them. They are commonly called limiting beliefs.
Limiting beliefs are deeply ingrained in our subconscious mind and determine what we even try to do with our lives. They keep us small and prevent us from going after our big dreams.
Your Limiting beliefs are behind that voice in your head that says:
” You can’t do that.”
“Who do you think you are?”
“What are you crazy?”
“This is just the way the world works”
These beliefs keep you small and tightly packed into that box that society wants you to live inside of.
The interesting thing is that most of these beliefs are not really true at all. They are just some story that you bought into somewhere along the way (just like everyone else). I suspect that if you begin to question them you will see how quickly they fall apart.
The reality is that each of us can be, do and have anything that our hearts desire. There is no limit to what is possible when you sent your mind to it. The trick is that you have to believe that it is possible before you can allow it to unfold for you.
I am curious about where in your life you are not allowing yourself to go for what you really want because you don’t think that you can have it?
Where are you allowing yourself to sit in a place that is feels sucky because you think that is “just the way it has to be” ?
If you are interested in doing something about these yucky limiting beliefs, you can sign up for Clearing YOUR Way. This low-cost, 60 minute, tele-class will show you how to identify your limiting beliefs and clear the way for you to start creating a life that totally rocks. If you want to take this class, sign up right now. It is live on January 6th at 7 PM EST. Sign up today!
The Freak Factor
Posted by: | CommentsI am still thinking about this week’s Defy the Box Radio Show. I had a great conversation with Dave Rendall about his manifesto called:
The Freak Factor : Discovering Uniqueness by Flaunting Weakness. ( Download it and read it!)
When I first read this I was very impressed. It resonated with the core message behind Defy the Box.
Let your Freak Flag Fly in order to enjoy great meaning and success.
I can’t stress this point enough…… It’s OK to be different, and there is nothing wrong with you.
It’s time to stop making yourself wrong and trying to stuff yourself into the “Box” that society is trying to cram you into. It is a waste of your time and energy, and it just doesn’t feel very good. You would be better served by embracing these “problems” that other folks think you have and finding an environment that supports them.
I can’t stress how important it is to create the right environment and find the right people to surround you. You are not necessarily born into it. Sometimes you need to go out and create it. I think that accepting yourself helps a lot with this. The way you feel about yourself and what makes you different directly affects who and what you attract in to your experience.
For example, when I had Kali from the Kink Academy on DTB radio, we talked about authentic sexuality and the importance of accepting and feeling good about your desires. If you feel that your kinky desires are bad, then you tend to attract a person into your experience who feels that you are bad for wanting those things…..which in turn feeds your feelings of being bad. When you embrace your desires and feel good about them, you will attract people in to your experience who are down with them too, and you can enjoy some fun and feel good about it.
Is there anything about you that you are tired of trying to fix?
What would happen if you embraced it ?
You can listen you the Freak Factor episode here:
The Rock
Posted by: | CommentsThis post was originally a guest post done for my friend Fiona at http://www.yearinamerica.net
Back in the day, I was part of a really cool woman’s mystery school and leadership program called the Priestess Path Apprenticeship. This program was truly amazing and opened the way for deep personal growth. This group of 24 women gathered together once a month and spent time in circle exploring many mystical practices and initiations aimed at making us confront our fear and inner-demons in order to know ourselves better. It was very powerful work.
One of the things we did was called the Quest. Each of us was lead on a journey down a dark path through an unknown forest. There were many stops along the way designed to challenge you and make you think. At one stop you were asked how heavy your past emotional baggage weighed on you. Then you were given a big rock to carry with you along the path to represent your baggage.
Let me tell you that carrying that rock sucked! It was awkward and took so much energy. It weighed me down. At each new stop along the trail it became more and more irritating. The longer I carried it, the heavier it became and the more I focused on it. I was not able to enjoy the cool stuff I was coming across along the path because I was so focused on carrying the rock and how much it sucked. The rock became the focus of everything.
Finally, I got fed up and decide to throw the rock off into the woods. Boy what a relief. I felt free. The Quest was fun again. I wondered why I did not ditch the rock sooner.
Interesting enough, I was the only one who chose to ditch their rock. Everyone else kept lugging the thing along until they came to a stop where someone else relived them of it. It never occurred to them that they might have a choice in the matter.
I wonder how many of you are carrying around a Rock of your own without giving thought to the idea that you have a choice in the matter.
There is always a choice.
Choose to let it go and focus on what feels good to you right now.
Choose to enjoy the adventure.
Ditch the Rock!
What Are Your Emotions Telling You???
Posted by: | CommentsLately, I have been talking about Hedonism and how important it is to seek out what feels good to you. This is important work because your emotions are a sure fire way to tell if you are in alignment with all the juicy goodness that is just waiting for you to discover it.
Your emotions are the part of you that is connected to your super deluxe navigation system. It is super deluxe because it is always honing in on what will bring you the most happiness, fun and meaning into your life. This system has an amazing big picture perspective and can clearly see the juicy goodness even when you can’t.
It communicates with you through your emotions. When you are on course, you feel good. You may feel happy, inspired, excited, or interested. The more you focus and think about these good feelings, the farther down the path of juicy goodness you will travel.
When you are veering off course you feel bad. You may become irritated, jealous, frustrated, or angry. The farther of course you veer, the more intense the emotions and the more likely you are to start manifesting negative experiences to go along with and validate the bad feelings. Life will start to suck. This is a clear indicator that you are way out of alignment and totally off course.
I want to add this in: It is not your job to control or change your emotions. All you need to do is learn how to tune into how you feel. Let your emotions guide you along and show you the way to a life that totally Rocks!
